Loops through a PHP manual to command WordPress

WordPress is not a magic lamp

Have you set up your organic server (your brain) to parse English? Then this post may pass mustard - I mean muster ;)

I am going to assign a few values by creating a series of expressions - by jingo in English!

Control structures and syntax of the English language are many and useful also.

It seems like the WP Codex (manual) is full of parallel lines that branch off and it's not clear when they merge to form a complete picture! You say syntax and I say grammar.

No curly syntax here.  // *N.B. Curly Syntax involves curly brackets { }* //

"Me Golem. You Mister."

OMG! Shared meaning.  

Pause. Deep breathe. Ok. 

The only "loop" that a lost, weary traveler finds in a desperate search for points of reference in WP Codex is a continuous retracing of steps over and over and over the same pages to spot the double entendre - the meaning hidden in code on the page.

A simple and direct introductory statement would be nice. There's a few missing statements, a few values that aren't properly assigned.

Ima gonna give ya some examples:

Number 1. You call it "The Loop" and you talk about "The Index" but I can't find where you say that this super power called "The Loop" is in "The Index". Ah, my precious!

Number 2. Nothing works unless to tell it what to do in the "Functions" file. So this was made clear at a Brisbane WordPress Meet-Up this week. Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas!

I'm in the Codex creche.

So finally I gave up on copying and pasting code and getting by on a little of the lingo.

How hard can PHP be?

Well, after repeating the manual chapters out loud several times pieces fall into place.

I just want to know the difference between single and double quotes and why on this planet do the tags work sometimes but not always.

Patience my pretty.

Put on your galoshes. Head through the forest, down into the wolf's lair, push the rock aside at the back of the dark tunnel and ... wait for a response from your forum question. Another day passes.

Hitler does live on - as a server. I've been shot down so many times that I feel like Sebastian

You know that meaning doesn't exist unless it's assigned a value - so much for objectivity.